Tanka & Gogyohka

Whose is that
face in the mirror
looking back at me
watching the passing years,
silently reflecting.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Another free-form Tanka. One day I’ll try one in strict form.
I have also been reading up about Gogyohka and it occurred to me that this also works well as two Gogyohka, hinged on the pivotal point of the Tanka and now I’m not sure which I prefer!:-

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Whose
is that
face in the mirror
looking back
at me?

Looking back
at me
watching
the passing years,
silently reflecting.

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7 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Freya Pickard
    Apr 02, 2012 @ 12:45:18

    love the intriguing feel to these
    I like them both…!

    Reply

  2. Libby
    Apr 02, 2012 @ 12:48:33

    Thank you. You see why I couldn’t decide and posted both!

    Reply

  3. Linda
    Apr 02, 2012 @ 13:24:36

    Wonderful image and so true.

    Reply

  4. aspenmeadows
    Apr 02, 2012 @ 20:59:44

    I prefer the 2nd form. I think it works really well.

    Reply

  5. Margie
    Apr 04, 2012 @ 12:30:50

    Hmmm, I am drawn to the second two stanza version. It has a melody to it. Lovely Libby.

    Reply

  6. chris
    Apr 04, 2012 @ 22:27:38

    I like both; not sure which I would choose, if I had to choose just one.

    Reply

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