The clock ticks through the silence of your absence.
I close my eyes and feel your arms enfold me.
* * * * * * * * * *
I have this afternoon just come back to “polish” the above stone that I posted this morning. (Are we allowed to do that?) I have changed one word – around has become enfold, which I think is an improvement, I hope you agree.
When I write a poem I go back to it time and again over a period of weeks and change a word here and there before I decide it is done. These small stones written freshly for each day are more spontaneous and are denied that luxury.
Jan 08, 2011 @ 13:48:52
I am not a poet. I don’t begin to understand poetry. But I read this poem at least 50 times and like a chime in my head all I kept thinking was…if I stop winding the clock will I stop loving him?
Jan 08, 2011 @ 14:48:22
Thank you. I’m glad you got so much from it. I’m about to “polish” it slightly now, I hope you think the change is an improvement.
Jan 08, 2011 @ 20:51:29
It’s a beautiful piece, Libby, really moving.
I have to admit I never let myself post anything right away. I always want to fiddle around once the dust has settled. No matter how good I thought it was at the time, it’s never right when I go back to it.
Sam x
Jan 09, 2011 @ 10:17:36
Good advice and I do indeed save some for a few days of polishing or to choose the right moment, though some would say the polishing is never finished and by waiting you miss the moment. It’s all a question of balance and hard to get right! I’m pleased you enjoyed the piece.
Jan 10, 2011 @ 17:14:59
Better late than never, but this just perfectly captures the ache of missing someone and the comfort from imagining them close by again. The ‘enfold’ – really wonderful.